Tammy Nelson



1:00am – 1:00pm PT
Understand the Motivation and Practical Interventions for Moving Forward

201 - Therapy with the One Who Cheats

Many therapists dedicate much therapy time helping betrayed partners heal deep emotional wounds in the wake of an affair. Therapy is often lopsided in a victim–perpetrator model, dealing with the injury of the betrayal. Less attention is typically paid to helping the partners who had the affair, one-night stand, or online infidelity, especially regarding why and how it happened.  

This workshop will give you a more nuanced understanding of the motivations for the infidelity and present practical interventions around the underlying meaning of the cheating and what it means about the relationship.   

Learning Objectives: 

  1. Describe three motivations for infidelity and how these relate to motivation and defense mechanisms in the betraying partner 
  2. Define the integration model of treatment to create positive treatment outcomes for both the couple and the individual  
  3. Assess for triangulations and avoid a “trauma triangle” in the treatment as an inadvertent reenactment of the affair 

Founder of the Integrative Sex Therapy Institute. Author, Getting the Sex You Want and Open Monogamy

Tammy Nelson, PhD, is a board-certified sexologist, Imago therapist, TEDx speaker, and the author of six books. She’s the director of the Integrative Sex Therapy Institute.